-
2007-12-11, 6:36 p.m.

give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
give up
yea i'll give up on my applications. i'll give up on trying to be a good kid. maybe giving up is something i have to learn. lose that determination to see things through. lose the values i once lived by. lose the mental toughness i though i had ingrained in me.

But i don't know how to. i ran my marathon, that immense sense of satisfaction. the knowledge that the finish line is somewhere out there, no matter how near or how far, it's there. but the finish line is always there. one day you'll cross the finish line. and it will be over. whatever you've worked so hard for. all the effort pays off eventually. and that's how i make myself believe and keep faith. maybe. maybe not.

i found something i wrote so long ago. i like writing. it's a form of escape. a form of release.

But i still do. I always have and i always will.

wonderful - memories